Smoke Screens and Fire
Have you ever had a false rumor spread about you? I have. Twice even that really hurt me. And it wasn’t good. The very first time was when I was in Junior Secondary School (JSS) 3. One of my friends came to me and said we needed to talk. I was surprised at his demeanor; something was obviouslywrong. My head went everywhere. Did something happen to him? Was he in trouble? And then I imagined…did he want to ask me out? I knew that would ruin our friendship so I hoped it was not the case. So after school, we went into an empty class and sat to talk. ‘Ramat, I am disappointed at you.’ he started. I was shocked. This was ABOUT ME? I HAD DONE SOMETHING? I laughed; skittish. He didn’t respond with his usual laughter. For someone who was so fun-filled and bubbly, his entire presence was such a picture of disappointment, that I was scared. What had I done? I asked, trying my best to keep my hands from shaking and my heart from exploding in my chest. ‘How could you? Like what were you thinking?!’ At this point, I was getting angry. I was in suspense already and I felt that he was being melodramatic. I said as much. He decided to cut to the chase. ‘If you wanted to have sex, you could have had sex with ONE GUY. What the hell was wrong with you that you slept with SEVEN guys? Like I am so disappointed with you.’ I swear, my mouth was hanging so wide, you could have seen my trachea. And no, this isn’t an exaggeration. When I got myself together, I ask what informed that thought. He said boys talk and the boys I had been with the week before had talked. Again, I asked for more information. ‘Were you at B’s bunk last week?’ to which I nodded in the affirmative. ‘Was there alcohol there?’ Again, I nodded, yes. ‘What happened after you all got drunk?’ First of all, I have NEVER drunk alcohol in my life. That statement still rings true till today; more than fourteen years after the allegation was made. I looked at him…and knew I had to describe everything that happened; in detail. So I did. A couple of us had snuck out of school. Three girls (including me) and four guys. They weren’t my regular crew but they knew I loved to have fun so they pitched a fence-jumping misdemeanor. Yes, I was that girl! Anyways, we went B’s bunk; a bunk being what we called a house owned by a student that was supposed to be in the school hostel. When we got there, it was a party! I was excited, more about the thrill of being away from school than the people I was with. Again, they weren’t my crew. Almost as soon as I thought of it, two of my ‘friends’ walked in and I felt like, ‘now that is what I am talking about’! We all laughed and talked about absolute nothing. Typical teenagers. Nothing untoward…until the last guy – whom I would say was my only true friend in that room – came in with a bottle of vodka or gin. I couldn’t tell. What I could tell was everyone was uber excited. So typically, I was too. I was finally going to drink some alcohol! As the bottle was passed around, I eagerly awaited my turn. I must confess, I was scared. What would I do if I got drunk? Would I be able to get home? Would my father kill me? And even worse, would my mother?! As these thoughts passed through my head, the bottle finally got to me. Soon as I stretched my hand to collect it, my friend – I will call him M – snatched the bottle. I went, ‘Hey! It is my turn.’ I tried to reach for it but he kept me at arm’s length. We struggled a bit and he dragged me outside. ‘Ramat, I no think say you get head for alcohol. Even if you get, I no go let you drink. The rest of us no get head for book. You get. We fit use drink spoil our head. If you do am, you fit no get sense again for book. So I no go let you drink.’ I was livid. I threw some choice words and we got into it a bit. In spite of my insistence, he refused to let me take a swig from the bottle. By this point, the rest of the gang were bored with our argument and one of the guys did them a favor by collecting the bottle and returning to the party. Mad at what I perceived was an epic embarrassment, I turned and left, swearing not to speak to any of them anymore. Fast forward to my conversation with my friend. Until that moment, I didn’t know the party went south; or was said to have gone south. So you could imagine my indignation; righteous that it was. Till today, I don’t even know if the group actually had an orgy or if it was a couple of boisterous boys who spread the rumor. What I do know is that most of them transferred schools for their Senior Secondary education and there was no one to ask who set fire to the rain. Despite everything I said, I don’t know if my friend believed my version of the story or not. He acted weird for a few days and I acted ashamed for more. I couldn’t bear to think that EVERYONE saw me as that girl who slept with SEVEN guys! Was there probable cause for the rumor? Yes. I had snuck out of school; I was at the apartment; there was alcohol and underage drinking; and supposedly, a lot of underage orgy. Why in God’s good earth should anyone believe that I wasn’t a part of it